You are not alone. We all feel lost from time to time. Adulting is hard.
This week I spoke to a group of undergraduate Engineers at George Washington University in Washington DC. The presentation was called “Reverse Engineering Success”. I doubled down on the importance of relationships, financial literacy, and personal development. So I thought I would share with you the core tenants of the talk….
- Our relationships are often cancerous.
- Financial success is about options, not things.
- What got us here, will NOT get us where we want to go!
In many cases, our relationships are cancerous. Whether they are innocuous comments that seem to be benign but slowly attack our goals or abusive relationships that literally zap our zeal for life.
In a world where we are more connected than ever, unfortunately, we are more isolated than ever. In recent studies, the happiest people are those with the deepest most authentic relationships. Unfortunately, society has pushed us towards friend counting and rewards quantity over quality. Social media is the worst in that regard.Takeaways:
- Use social media to deepen relationships and NOT as a scoreboard to collect “friends”, likes, and comments.
- Chances are HIGHLY LIKELY that our relationships are holding us back from becoming the best versions of ourselves.
Quotes by smart guys who agree…
“We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with.” – Jim Rohn
“Show me your friends and I will show you your future.” – John Wooden
There are people we interact with daily/weekly that are quietly/benignly and not necessarily purposefully sabotaging our growth.
Our Goal: Trying to lose weight.
They’ll say: Come on!! It’s just one dessert.
Our Goal: Trying to start a business.
They’ll say: Wow! That sounds risky, you sure you want to do that?
Our Goal: Trying to climb the corporate ladder.
They’ll say: Why are you working so hard? You need to enjoy life.
And obviously, the other range of the spectrum are abusive relationships that attack us at our core stealing our momentum to accomplish anything significant.
**Action: Make a concerted effort to cut-off a relationship that is not helping you be the best version of yourself and definitely disengage from an overly toxic/abusive one. **
Takeaway: Financial success is about options, not things.
Social media, news media, movies, and society, in general, will have us believe that financial success is about luxury homes, cars, and vacations.
I think we should view life as traveling along a long high way.
Increasing financial intelligence and success creates off-ramps out ahead of us on that journey allowing us to change direction or effectively change the final destination of where we want to go. We tend to bog ourselves down with fiscal responsibilities (monthly payments, mortgages, car loans, consumer debt, etc.) because that is the script we were told to follow as we grew up. But, if we can minimize these responsibilities and simultaneously grow our monthly take-home pay then options can come into play at pivotal points in our lives.
Have a crappy boss? Now you can quit.
Tired of the long winters? Move.
Want to take a 3-month sabbatical? Great, sit on the beach!
Want to start a side business? Do it.
Fridge broke? Buy a new one.
**Action: Really think about overhauling our views on money and wealth. Think long term but make strategic habitual changes in the short term ASAP. **
What got us here, will NOT get us where we want to go!!
Do NOT coast. Everything in our bodies and minds physiologically, and everything in our social environment is going to tell us to stop growing. That what we have done so far is enough.
- If we aren’t learning something new or feeling challenged, it might be time for a change.
- If we don’t feel needed, it might be time for a change.
Personal growth paired with the positive feedback loop of feeling needed or appreciated is the quickest and fastest way to job/life satisfaction.
**Action: What in your life are you spending significant time on, but is not challenging you or making you feel needed? Time to take a hard look at that activity and make some sort of change.**
Until next week,